Worzels World - Selfies, False Gods and Narcissism

 

The concept that self-esteem is good for people, and especially for the young, gained credence in the late 1980s. The crazy idea was that in order to free ourselves from any and everything harmful, like drug addiction and domestic violence to teenage pregnancy and sub standard academic achievement, we simply had to believe that we were amazing and special. 

Like so many other bogus concepts, the idea that high self-esteem was an indispensable element for success and functionality originated in California. This is amazing in itself. Having lived and worked there I can bear witness to the fact that it is probably the very place in all the world where levels of human dysfunction are highest. Even worse, the idea came from a politician. John Vasconsellos managed to wangle three quarters of a million bucks from the state legislature to set up a ‘self esteem task force‘. He maintained that when peoples’ self-esteem was increased they blossom and become much higher achievers. Three years later this task force announced that ‘there is a critical link between competence and self-confidence’. 

Somehow everyone seemed eager to pick up this particular ball and run with it. For two thousand years societies steeped in the Judeo Christian tradition have championed the need for modesty and taught the virtue of humility. However in just a few short years this was replaced by the silver bullet of self-esteem. This new doctrine invaded the education systems of the western world and completely altered the way many people raised their children. 

It was all very well done, but there was one problem – it was complete rubbish and doesn’t work. It turned out to be a lie propagated by the self-esteem task force, presumably to justify the money spent on such a ludicrous endeavour. The self-esteem doctrine put the cart before the horse. Success and achievement certainly can lead to an increase in self-confidence, however self-confidence or high self-esteem doesn’t necessarily lead to high achievement. 

Along with this self-esteem culture comes a barrage of unrealistic expectations for individualistic perfection embodied in the selfie culture. Generations subjected to this self-centered philosophy have higher rates of drug abuse, depression and suicide than any previous generation. Taught to elevate the self to god-like status they believe they are special and somehow above the common herd. They think they have things called ‘rights’ that are inherent rather than worked for and guarded. Indoctrinated with false expectations they are consequently destined for disappointment when reality asserts itself. Selfish and narcissistic they lack empathy for others. High self-esteem rather than improving a person fosters arrogance and self-delusion.

We are all now encouraged to have self-esteem without the need to build a self that is worth esteeming. Having been told to dream the dream, very few know how to turn those dreams into reality. If you’re positive you can be anything you want to be, they say. This is all well and good in its way but what a great many seem to want is not worth having. When mediocrity is rewarded and deemed good enough then mediocrity is what we’ll get. It seems that in today’s world there is no incentive to strive for excellence.

Sentiments like ‘what is needed is a strong vision for the future‘ have been  expressed a million times in the past and I bet none that said it envisioned the current reality that was at that time the future. Today’s vision for tomorrow cannot be made manifest without making good choices and doing what is right – now. And since now is the only time right things can be done it doesn’t look too good for the visionaries with their strong visions.  

Visions without actions are only dreams, and sooner or later we must awaken to confront a reality that is what it is, not what we might wish it to be. There is an old saying, ‘If wishes were horses beggars would ride’. 

It becomes obvious to all of us sooner or later that we all make mistakes, that we all fail, that we are not gods but are all too human. In the light of truth the old virtue of humility appears preferable after all. If our expectations are based upon reality rather than falsehood the inevitable disappointments in life will not crush us and success will be sweeter for the knowledge that it is not necessarily our right.

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We are all now encouraged to have self-esteem without the need to build a self that is worth esteeming. Having been told to dream the dream, very few know how to turn those dreams into reality.